Last of the Old Notes

Here is the last of the observations that I saved from 25-30 years ago...

High School

Those four years go by so fast!
Keep tabs on your child's friends and activities. I talked to them every day about what went on that day. Of course, some were more communicative than others.

You need to make sure that they are taking the proper courses. Look into what is offered. Do not depend on counselors to steer your child in the right direction.
It never hurts to ask questions about requirements for graduation, honors' programs, etc.
I always tried to inform teachers immediately to let me know if homework wasn't being handed in, or if there was a behavior problem!(It is better to nip any problems in the bud from the getgo! You should apply this at every grade level.)

If your child wants to work, I recommend only a few hours a week to make a little pocket money. We were lucky that our girls were able to work a few hours a week at the dance studio, and there was babysitting for both boys and girls.

It is good for teens to be involved in after-school activities such as sports, theatrics, clubs, and so forth, because along with classwork and homework, being busy is the greatest way to feel useful and productive! Community service and volunteering are also worthwhile ways to be involved.

Today(2012), I would reiterate all of the above with emphasis on keeping close tabs on your children! I have told many working mothers that, in my opinion, it is of vital importance that a parent be in the home for teens when they return from school each day! Why many parents think that supervision should lessen for high schoolers is beyond me! At this age youngsters still need structure, though they would never admit it! My children always knew that if they were in any kind of situation that warranted it, they could fall back on "My mom(dad) won't let me!). If their friends thought I was mean, so be it! I know there were kids who did not like to call our home because I answered the phone most of the time!

We had very few parties at our house because they knew we did not allow alcohol. I felt bad for Nina the one time she did have people over because she was so busy checking up on whether anyone was trying to sneak booze, that she really did not have time to enjoy herself!

A few years later it was not unusual to see a yard full of cars, and groups of "alternative" young people on our porch and in our yard, because we were hosting a "show" in our creepy basement! We had so many bands play there, rattling the windows upstairs, and necessitating the wearing of earplugs! (I have NEVER understood just WHY the bass had to be SO incredibly LOUD!) Sometimes I would offer homemade brownies, with a jar for monetary donations for our missionary cousin in Haiti! There were lots of laughs and conversations on our porch between sets....many of my evaluations of those who attended were based on whether they greeted me, and if they could carry on a conversation(or would) with me! There was no music after 11:00p.m., and we informed our neighbors about upcoming shows. I remember being amused when passing cars would slow way down when they approached our yard, wondering what in the world was going on at that old house!

It is good when you can offer a wholesome place where young people can gather, just to hang out, work on a project, do homework, play games, and so on. I am proud to say that our two granddaughters, who are now in college, have such a home. Just make sure that YOU are nearby and that all abide by the rules of your home!